I Can't Handle Writing Erotica Today - My Teenage Daughter Was Accosted

I write stories about domination and BDSM, populated with feisty heroines who secretly crave a strong man and the Alpha males who step in and take charge.  But right now, all that has me feeling a little sick.

I woke up this morning planning to drive my daughter to school and spend the whole day working on my latest book.  She's a high school senior in an early college program, attending classes at the community college.  On the way to school, she told me she'd seen one of the counselor yesterday to report an incident that happened while she waited outside a classroom.  Most of her classes this year are with adults of varying ages.  Apparently an "old guy" in his forties sat down on a bench in the hallway next to her.  She said he was obviously drunk.  He began talking to her, asking questions, moving closer, and finally putting his arm around her shoulders.

Heather got up and walked away but the guy pursued her down an empty hall.  She was able to get away, then headed to the office to report the creep to a counselor.

Yesterday when I picked her up, she mentioned that some guy she didn't know was coming on to her, but didn't go into detail about what had happened.  I assumed it was one of the boys in her class giving her a construction-worker style "Hey, baby" as she walked by and told her to ignore him.  Like most women, I think she was ashamed at first to tell anyone what happened, even her mother.

We've seen it over and over.  Many of us have experienced it ourselves.  The victim ends up feeling like she's the one at fault - like she somehow caused the incident or should have been able to handle it differently. Young or old, women are usually smaller, physically weaker.  The men are bigger, stronger - sometimes even rich, famous and powerful.  Think TV icon versus his victims who finally came forward and are being accused of lying - all twenty-five of them. 

Heather is small and delicate and quiet.  In short, the perfect victim for a sexual predator.  I had a long talk with her - told her if anything like that ever happens again, she needs to get really loud, really fast and then get as far away as possible from the man.  Yell at him, holler for help, threaten to call the police, create as big a scene as she can and don't be afraid of embarrassing herself or him.  Come out strong and hard.  It's the last thing he'll expect from her- and if she's lucky, God willing, it will be enough.

I'm spared the guilt of wondering whether I caused this.  No one in my home town knows what I write or the pen name I use.  So I don't have to ask myself if this creep singled my daughter out because he's read something I wrote.

My heroines are never victims, forced to do anything they don't already want to do deep inside.  And from what I've read, 90% of the readers of books like mine are women.  Women of all ages and all walks of life. Happily married.  Single.  Divorced.  Students, soccer moms, grandmothers.

As always, I'm turning to writing to work it through.  And here's what I know is true.  It doesn't matter who you are, what you may fantasize about, what you read, what you write or what you wear.  NO ONE has the right to touch you without your permission, to treat you with anything less than respect.  

But I've lived in the real world too long,  Heather.  And I know that saying it doesn't make it so.


      

Deduct Your Dildo - Sex Sells Tax Tips for Erotic Authors

Today's topic always gets me hot.  MONEY!
                                    
This month we'll all be getting 1099's from our publishers.  If you're a brand new author - Congratulations!  You now fall into the category of a small business for tax purposes.

If you're new to earning 1099 income, you're also going to get a nasty shock.  Every dime you earn isn't just subject to income tax. If you made over $400 as an author, you're also facing a bill for self-employment tax - 15.3% of your net income.

That means if you were successful enough to make it into the top 5% of all authors and earned $10,000 or more, you owe Uncle Sam at least $1,530 extra!

But if you've kept good records, every dime you spent on a deductible expense will lower that amount.  That means if you treated yourself to a new Kindle for about a hundred bucks in 2014, you can probably deduct it. It may not sound like much but the $15.30 you save pays for takeout pizza next time you're trying to meet a deadline and don't have time to cook.

Besides being a self-employed author, I've owned four other small businesses, from a real estate company to a food concession at Miami Arena.  Over the years, I've learned a lot about how to take advantage of every single deduction available.

Here's where I issue my disclaimer:  I am NOT an accountant or a tax attorney.  The following information is gleaned from years of personal experience.  If you have any questions about specific deductions, talk to an accountant.  If you don't have one, feel free to use my personal rule of thumb for picking a good accountant.  He or she has to save me MORE than I'm paying to have the return prepared!

Here's a list of basic deductions a small business can claim:

1.  Business Equipment
This includes computers, printers, copy machines and printers.  Here's a useful quote on what constitutes business equipment from Jeremy Slaughter at Demand Media:

"Businesses may also require specialized equipment such as tools, manufacturing equipment or heavy machinery. For tax purposes, you can deduct all of this equipment along with any other equipment used in the operation of a business. They key is determining how to deduct each type of equipment.
Small businesses can expense any equipment with a useful life of less than one year. Common examples include electronics not considered to last more than a year and hand tools such as shovels and rakes. Business owners typically deduct equipment like this as “small tools and equipment” on an income tax return."

Okay - specialized equipment, electronics not considered to last more than a year and HAND TOOLS? Sounds like vibrators and dildos to me!  ( Assuming you find a way to use said equipment in a scene in one of your books)

2.  Travel Expenses
Did you attend a writer's conference workshop, convention?  Did you visit a new location for one of your books? Airfare, gas, tolls, hotels, meals, cab fare - all of those can be deductible expenses.  Keep receipts from everything.

3.  Supplies
Here are a few examples - yellow pads, ink cartridges, printer paper, business cards

4.  Other deductions
Advertising, including giveaway prizes and ads in on-line trade publications
Books
Internet access
And if you're doing really well, you can set up a self-employed retirement account and deduct every dime you're saving so you don't have to write porn when you get old!

Don't miss my other posts in this series:
     Why Write Erotica - Here Are 10,000 Reasons
   

 

Sex Sells - A Sneak Peek At The Last Taboo

We’ve written about hot Doms in their dungeons, double penetration by well-endowed aliens, menages with twin cowboys, rectal exams by stern doctors, dressing up as little girls and getting our bare bottoms spanked - in short, doing kinky sexual things to every conceivable bodily part with a variety of partners and playthings. But there's one topic that up till now has been off-limits in most blogs about erotic romance.

                              Money.  There.  I've said it and I feel so much better.

This year I'm kicking off a new weekly series about the business we're all in - the business of writing erotic romance novels.  If you don't consider the hours you spend hunched over a keyboard as running your own business, it's time to rethink what you're doing.

You may say you write for fun, or for self-gratification, or because you just "have to put all those stories in your head on paper."  Okay.  Then send me your royalties and advance checks and I'll believe you.  Otherwise admit that the money you make is important.  Even if it's only a pittance, it's YOUR pittance. That first check for a new book is a cause for celebration, whether it buys you a Porche or a pizza.

But as someone who has owned and operated five small businesses before I began writing full time, I'm going to tell you one simple secret  - it's not just how much you make, it's how much you keep.

Of course, if you don't make much right now, that may not sound like a shocking revelation.  We're all financial virgins when we start out.  But I got very good at figuring out how to keep as much as possible of what I earned when I married a successful salesman and we started our first business together.  We had an accountant who took care of us.  At least that's what I thought.  When he presented me with a tax bill bigger than my total income the year before I got married, well...that's when Uncle Sam popped my fiscal cherry!

Every Wednesday we'll explore a new topic.  Together with guest bloggers I'll share ideas that will drive your sales higher, hot new trends in the market, which social media platforms REALLY work - and how to keep more of those Benjamins in your pocket.  He may not look very hot in that picture, but he sure can bring you a lot of satisfaction!  

Here are some upcoming posts:

Longer Isn’t Always Better  - Get your mind out of the gutter!  It's about book length 

Have You Hit the Dirty Thirty Yet? - Is there a "secret formula" for success? 

It’s All About That Base - How to build a team of super fans

            

Self-Gratification – Is it time to consider indie publishing?

Never Kill A Puppy - Writing rules and when to break them

       

How Much Money Do Romance Writers REALLY Make -Oooh, this one gets me hot!

I hope you'll join me January 7th for the kickoff.